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#Perfectionism May #Hinder #CareerGrowth

July 6, 2020

Is Perfectionism Hindering Your Career Growth?

Are you always worried that no matter how hard you try it’s never good enough? Do you feel you must give 100 percent on everything or be considered a failure? Do you delay completing projects because you can’t get them right? Avoid giving opinions because they may sound stupid?

If so, you may be a perfectionist. Perfectionism refers to self-defeating thoughts and behaviors that cause people to set unrealistic goals, fear making mistakes.

Some perfectionism is good. It can advance your career and encourage excellence and pride in accomplishments. But excessive perfectionism may make you afraid to try. You worry about disapproval. Productivity and creativity diminish.

Perfectionist attitudes can interfere with career success. Perfectionism leads to stress, impaired health, troubled interpersonal relationships, and reduced feelings of accomplishment and confidence. Other consequences include procrastination, fear of risk-taking and rejection, conformity, self-consciousness and doubt. Perfectionists are vulnerable to depression, performance anxiety,pessimism,compulsiveness, loneliness, disappointment,impatience, frustration and anger.

Perfectionists differ from healthy strivers. Strivers set goals based on their own needs and capabilities rather than external expectations. Their goals are realistic, potentially attainable. They enjoy the process of accomplishing challenging tasks rather than focusing solely on results. Their reactions to failure are limited to specific situations rather than generalized to self-worth. They accept constructive feedback and bounce back from failure quickly, energetically.

Perfectionists believe:

– It’s possible to do things perfectly.

– Mistakes must not be made.

– The highest standards must always be met.

– Failure to reach goals equals personal shortcomings.

– People judge others negatively if they see flaws.

– Needs are secondary to goal attainment.

– Everything is black or white, right or wrong.

Overcoming Perfectionism

— Accept yourself. Acknowledge who you are, not who you “should” be. List accomplishments and personal qualities that deserve recognition. Ask friends for feedback and support. Take pride in successes.

Forgive mistakes. Accept the “ideal” as a guideline, goal to be worked toward, not to be achieved 100 percent. Give yourself credit for good performance and effort, even though not perfect. Use thought stopping techniques when you mentally scold yourself for not being “good enough.” Reward yourself for progress.

— Eliminate self-defeating thoughts and behaviors. Realize perfectionism is an unattainable illusion.

Identify irrational thinking patterns, and dispute deceptive thoughts. For example, “I’ll get a reward if I perform perfectly. “Observe whether superiors always notice when you do things perfectly. When you recognize the inaccuracy of these beliefs, reevaluate. For example, if you decide you feel good when performing certain tasks perfectly, continue this behavior. But, if nobody notices, you may decide to skip perfection.

Write answers to questions such as, ”What perfectionist characteristics do I have? What irrational beliefs do I possess? How do these impede my career advancement? “What’s the worst thing that could happen if I don’t complete things perfectly?

Try replacing one self-defeating thought or behavior with a more positive alternative one every week. Believe you’ll succeed. Even though you’re not the model, you’re moving in a positive direction.

— Set attainable goals based on your purpose and strengths. Set each new goal one level beyond your present level of accomplishment. Avoid all or nothing thinking. Reassess plans.

Outline realistic, flexible time frames for achievement of goals. Be patient as you work toward goals. Enjoy the process and learning involved.

Evaluate success in terms of what you’ve accomplished and degree of enjoyment. Experiment with standards of excellence. Instead of aiming for 100 percent, try 80 percent for some projects.

Recognize mistakes are part of the process. “Imperfect” results don’t lead to punitive consequences. Learn from mistakes. Acknowledge your right to make them. When you stop making errors, you stop learning.

— Set time limits on tasks. Prioritize these.Outline activities that will move you toward your goal. Meet deadlines. When time is up, move to another activity.

— Don’t take criticism personally. Accept constructive feedback. Learn from it.

Remember, a healthy achiever has drive. A perfectionist is driven. Pablo Cassals advises: ”The main thing in life is not to be afraid to be human.”

Author Bio: Carole Kanchier, PhD, is an internationally recognized newspaper/digital columnist, speaker, registered psychologist, coach and author of award winning, Questers Dare to Change Your Job and Life. https://www.amazon.com/Questers-Dare-Change-Your-Life/dp/1508408963. Questers shows how to reevaluate lifelong personal and professional goals and plan for success.

Carole Kanchier has taught at University of California, Berkeley and Santa Cruz, University of Alberta, and other institutions of higher learning. Dr. Kanchier is known for her pioneering, interdisciplinary approach to human potential.

Dr. Kanchier is available for consultations and interviews. Her team will be delighted to send a complementary PDF of Questers Dare to Change.

Contact: carole@daretochange.com; http://www.questersdaretochange.com

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Are You a Good #Listener?

July 5, 2020

carole@daretochange.com

Are You a Good Listener?

Are you a good listener? Do others feel comfortable talking to you?

Listening skills are crucial for personal and professional success. Unfortunately, studies suggest that only about 25 percent of us listen efficiently.

Ineffective listening affects productivity and morale. Faulty listening habits can alienate customers, damage relationships, and cause people to miss appointments and misinterpret suggestions. Managers, who are rated inefficient by subordinates, tend to be poor listeners. Subordinates, who fail to listen, may make mistakes.

Are you a good listener?
Answer “yes” or “no.”

1. I finish sentences for others.
2. When listening, I tend to think about what I will say next.
3. I listen for main ideas.
4. I judge content, skip over delivery errors.
5. When others ask questions, I give them full attention.
6. Certain emotion-laden words anger me.
7. I maintain eye contact.
8. I get distracted easily.
9. I take intensive notes.
10. I listen between the lines to voice tones.
11. I mentally summarize the speaker’s message.
12. I anticipate what the speaker may say, then finish his statement.
13. I give the speaker an opportunity to explain the issue.
14. I never put others on the defensive.
15. I tend to monopolize conversations.

Scoring: One point for each “yes” to 3, 4, 5, 7, 10, 11, 13 and 14; and “no” to 1, 2, 6, 8, 9, 12, and 15. The higher your score the more you tend to be a good listener. To further verify your listening ability, ask a colleague to complete the quiz for you.

Effective listening is an active process. Like most skills, listening takes practice. Become aware of your ineffective listening habits, and practice effective skills.

Tips for effective listening

— Focus on the speaker and attend to his or her message. This enables the speaker to feel comfortable sharing thoughts and feelings.

— Demonstrate appropriate body language. Lean forward slightly and look the speaker in the eyes. Instead of sitting behind a desk, join the speaker in an adjoining chair. When appropriate, smile, frown, laugh, or maintain silence to let the speaker know you understand what he is saying.

Radiate interest and offer encouragement. Speak softly (“Uh-huh”) and nod. Make comments such as “Fascinating,” and offer prompts: “What did he say?” and “What did you do then?”

Ask questions for clarification after the speaker has finished so you won’t interrupt his train of thought. Repeat, in your own words, what the speaker said so you can ensure your understanding is correct. For example, “So you’re saying …”

— Listen for main ideas. Important points the speaker may want to convey could be mentioned at the start or end of a talk. Attend to statements that begin with phrases such as, “My point is …” or “The thing to remember is …”

— Listen between the lines. Concentrate not only on what’s being said but also on the attitudes and motives behind the words. Note changing voice tone and volume, facial expressions, hand gestures and body movements.

Observe whether the voice message is congruent with auditory and behavioral cues. Although the speaker says he’s excited about an idea or project, his lack of spontaneous movement, wandering or downcast eyes, unanimated voice tone, masked face or hunched posture may indicate he feels differently.

— Focus on the message. not speaker. the speaker’s accent, speech impediment or disorganized thought patterns.

— Tune out everything but the speaker. To minimize distractions, close the office door, don’t answer the telephone, and turn off the computer. Don’t doodle or click your pen and continue to focus on what the speaker is saying.

— Don’t interrupt. This signals you’re not paying attention, and suggests the speaker’s comments are unimportant.

Ensure the speaker has finished conveying the message before talking. If the speaker is launching a complaint against you, wait until he is finished. This will allow the speaker to feel his point has been made.

— Keep an open mind. Don’t make assumptions about what the speaker is saying. Wait until she is finished before coming to conclusions. Instead of dismissing the person or topic as dull, consider this as an opportunity to learn something new.

— Don’t top the speaker. If someone is discussing the Rockies, avoid reminiscing about a trip to Italy.

Consider listening a learning experience and an opportunity to enhance relationships with others.

Questers Dare to Change provides additional tips for effective listening as well as other skills required for career advancement. https://www.amazon.com/Questers-Dare-Change-Your-Life/dp/1508408963

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July 4 2020 – President Quotes

July 4, 2020

Inspiring US President Quotes

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Keeping Your Cool

July 3, 2020

Keeping Your Cool

< Dare to Change Your Job and and Life describes how to manage anger and take charge of lifelong career growth: https://www.amazon.com/Questers-Dare-Change-Your-Life/dp/1508408963

Have you been so angry that you wanted to throw something at another colleague? Lost your temper and voiced anger?

Anger sends messages such as, “You’ve offended me.” “I don’t like you.” Expressing anger tends to generate more anger.

While anger is a natural emotion, mismanagement of anger can have serious consequences. Anger in the workplace is a problem when it adversely affects co-workers and productivity, or turns into violence and expensive litigation.

Anger has a negative effect on worker morale, productivity and teamwork. Itcan also result in health problems; angrypeople tend to have more cardio-vascular and stress-related illnesses than calm people.

Do you manage anger well?

Answer “yes” or “no:”

1. When angry, I act before thinking.

2. It’s easy for me to forgive.

3. My anger goes away after I explode.

4. I’m rarely angry.

5. I become mad to get what I want.

6. I’m easygoing.

7. I lose control when my anger takes over.

8. When provoked, I think before acting.

9. I need to win arguments.

10. I can calm situations when people are angry with me.

11. I hang on to anger.

12. I’m usually calm and centered.

13. I take anger out on people around me.

14. I know when I’m getting angry.

15. People are out to get me.

Scoring: One point for each “yes” to odd-numbered statements and each “no” to even numbered ones. Three or less suggests you manage anger well; four to seven suggests you should learn anger management strategies; and eight or higher indicates you need anger management counseling or coaching.

Managing anger

1. Take time out. Count to 10 before acting. Go to a quiet place and breathe deeply if you’re enraged, or wait a few days to cool down.

Shift gears. Dispel angry energy by performing more mundane, routine aspects of your job.

2. Identify feelings and thoughts. Clarify and objectify the issue. Know why you’re mad. Remind yourself to keep anger in check.

Think. Write down your version of the incident. Take responsibility for your feelings. Explore ways to resolve the problem. Plan how you’ll communicate your view.

3. Communicate. Share your thoughts and feelings with the person. Discuss the factual basis of each other’s thoughts to get a different interpretation. Give merit to another’s view until you can validate its accuracy. Change your view if new information proves you wrong.

Listen. Conflict accelerates when people don’t feel heard. Consider others’ viewpoints carefully without defensiveness. Try to understand the message even if you disagree. Attend to words, tone of voice, expressions and gestures. React thoughtfully. Pay attention to what is said without interrupting, judging or offering solutions. Ask questions when you’re not clear about something. This enables you to get more information and demonstrates interest and concern.

Summarize what you hear the person say to correct misunderstandings. Let her know you hear the emotional content of the message. Listen between the lines. What’s the person feeling but not saying.

When there’s a pause, demonstrate understanding. For example, “I understand.” You’re not necessarily agreeing with the person or giving in, but you’re showing interest and respect the other’s concern.

4. Share negative emotions in person. Never criticize, complain, or send inflammatory remarks via emails, answering machines or notes.

Don’t respond negatively to inflammatory mail. Question your assumptions for validity. Contact senders by phone or email to schedule one-to-one meetings in person or over the phone to discuss concerns.

5. Negotiate. Look for creative compromises that consider needs and priorities of all parties. Ask those involved for suggestions. Choices make people feel they have control.

6. Forgive. Release negative feelings, the painful past and need for revenge. Search for positive solutions.

7. Practice makes perfect. Identify someone who handles anger well. List three effective anger management strategies he or she uses. List three ways you usually express anger, and three ways in which you could react more positively.

Rehearse anger management strategies.Practicing self-control will enable you to remain calm when tension is high. You’ll also become a better communicator, maintain fairness and integrity, and have a more harmonious, productive workplace.

Review sample book chapters: http://www.questersdaretochange.com/book/excerpts/ and Carole’s blogs: http://www.questersdaretochange.com/blog

Author Bio: Carole Kanchier, PhD, is an internationally recognized newspaper/digital columnist, registered psychologist, speaker, coach and author of Questers Dare to Change. Kanchier has taught at University of California, Berkeley and Santa Cruz, University of Alberta, and other institutions of higher learning, and worked with diverse individuals and organizations. Dr. Kanchier is known for her pioneering, interdisciplinary approach to human potential. She is available for consultations and interviews.

Contact: Carole Kanchier, PhD

carole@questersdaretochange.com; www.questersdaretochange.com

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Are You a #RiskTaker?

July 2, 2020

Most successful people have learned to risk. The good feelings that result from taking a risk can be incredible. You see yourself as a survivor. You force yourself to grow by calling on abilities you haven’t used. Achieving your goal will enhance your sense of accomplishment, self-confidence and knowledge.

Are You a Risk Taker?

Answer “yes” or “no.”

1. I often wish people would be more definite.

2. When I want something, I’ll go out on a limb for it.

3. If the possible reward is very high, I would put money into a business that could fail.

4. I like to plan my activities.

5. I enjoy taking risks.

6. I prefer job challenge to job security.

7. I enjoy working on problems that have ambiguous answers.

8. I accept the possibility of failure.

9. It bothers me when something unexpected interrupts my routine.

10. I trust decisions I make spontaneously.

11. In games, I usually go for broke.

12. Once my mind is made up, that’s it.

13. I’m in favor of very strict enforcement of laws regardless of the consequences.

14. I try to avoid situations that have uncertain outcomes.

15. I would not borrow money for a business deal even if it might be profitable.

Scoring: 2 points for responding “yes” to each of the following statements: 2, 3, 5, 6, 7, 8, 10, and 11.

A score of 10 or higher, suggests you enjoy taking risks. You are autonomous, like challenge, are confident, flexible and open to new experiences. However, if your score is 14 or more, your desire to risk may sometimes be extreme. A score of 4 to 8 suggests you may be open to some new experiences, but are overly organized or rigid in other areas. If you scored 3 or lower, you prefer a secure, well-ordered lifestyle.

Strengthen ability to risk.

If you want to develop your full potential, learn to take planned risks. Try some of the following:

— Make small changes first. This enables you to develop confidence and trust. You can then move on to more major decisions. Experiment with a different hair style or food. Change your routine. At work, offer new ways of tackling a job.

— Have a goal. A risk without a clear purpose can backfire. Focus on things you can change. Have positive expectations, do your homework, know the pros and cons, and listen to your intuition.

— Believe in yourself. Affirm yourself. Replace any negative thoughts or statements with positive ones. Avoid phrases such as, “I can’t,” “I will never. …”

— Turn failure or crises into growth opportunities. Consider “failure” a temporary setback. Depersonalize setbacks. Learn from these. Ask yourself what you would do differently and then make the necessary modifications.

— Look upon something new as an exciting opportunity to challenge yourself andto grow. If you don’t try, how will you ever find out if you can do it?

— Balance tentativeness with commitment. Set goals but don’t write these in stone. Be open to new experiences.

— Establish a support group. Confide in and ask for help from supportive family or friends. Associate with positive people.

— Describe barriers that are blocking you from making a desired change. For example, Personal Barriers include fear of loss of a secure income; fear of failure (such as starting a new job); fear of what others will think; fear of success; and guilt that change might create family hardships.

Societal Barriers include old notions of “career”; outdated retirement policies; traditional gender roles; and blocks imposed by educational institutions, unions and professional associations.

— Complete the Fantasy Risk Exercise: Think of an important risk you would like to take. What appeals to you about taking this risk? What would you gain? What is frightening about this risk? What will you lose? What’s the worst thing that could happen if it turned out badly? If the worst happened, what would you do?

Where could you get information to pursue this risk? From whom could you get support? What could you do to make this less risky? Less irreversible?

If you broke the risk into small steps, what would the first step be? How soon could you take it? Do this for each step. Evaluate the outcome of the risk. Did it turn out as expected? If not, why? What have you learned?

Celebrate your success whether or not it turned out as expected. Gradually, you will see yourself as a risk taker.

Creating a life worth living and finding the courage to risk pursuing you dreams isn’t easy, but you can do it! Questers, described in award winning, Questers Dare to Change Your Job and Life, show you how! http://www.amazon.com/Questers-Dare-Change-Your-Life/dp/1508408963

Check audible Questers: https://www.audible.com/pd/Questers-Dare-to-Change-Your-Job-and-Life-Audiobook/B07VZNKGJF?asin=B07VZNKGJF&ipRedirectOverride=true&overrideBaseCountry=true&pf_rd_p=34883c04-32e5-4474-a65d-0ba68f4635d3&pf_rd_r=TN801GRP49AWQSSYMDYC1

Author Bio: Carole Kanchier, PhD, is an internationally recognized newspaper/digital columnist, registered psychologist, speaker, coach and author of Questers Dare to Change. Kanchier has taught at University of California, Berkeley and Santa Cruz, University of Alberta, and other institutions of higher learning. Dr. Kanchier, who has worked with clients representing varied industries, is known for her pioneering, interdisciplinary approach to human potential. Dr. Kanchier is available for consultations and speaking engagements.

Contact: carole@daretochange.com; carole@questersdaretochange.com; www.questersdaretochange.com

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COVID-19 TIME OUT

April 21, 2020

Use Time Out To Re-examine Goals and Plan for Success

Questers Dare to Change Your Job and Life Shows How

https://www.amazon.com/Questers-Dare-Change-Your-Life/dp/1508408963

Based on ongoing research, award winning, Questers Dare to Change, answers many questions you have about lifelong career decision making.

* Are you a Quester? Check Quester traits with self-scoring quiz: http://www.questersdaretochange.com/services-2/quester-quiz/

* Courage – A crucial skill in changing times

* Develop a lifelong master plan for career success

* Develop a winning mindset

* Turn setbacks into opportunities

* Understand how job dissatisfaction affects health and productivity

* Are you ready for a career shift?

* Overcome fear of failure

* Entry, mastery, and disengagement – Where are you?

* Find your truth – Complete self-scoring quizzes

… And so much more

Check audible Questers: https://www.audible.com/pd/Questers-Dare-to-Change-Your-Job-and-Life-Audiobook/B07VZNKGJF?asin=B07VZNKGJF&ipRedirectOverride=true&overrideBaseCountry=true&pf_rd_p=34883c04-32e5-4474-a65d-0ba68f4635d3&pf_rd_r=TN801GRP49AWQSSYMDYC1

Please review sample book chapters: http://www.questersdaretochange.com/book/excerpts/ and Carole’s blogs: http://www.questersdaretochange.com/blog

Carole Kanchier will be delighted to send a complementary PDF version of Questers for review, and be available for a consultation or speaking engagement at your request. Sample articles/columns are on Carole’s web site: www.questersdaretochange.com/blog.

Contact: Carole Kanchier, PhD

carole@questersdaretochange.com; www.questersdaretochange.com

Author Bio: Carole Kanchier, PhD, is an internationally recognized newspaper/digital columnist, registered psychologist, coach and author of Questers Dare to Change Your Job and Life. Kanchier has taught at University of California, Berkeley and Santa Cruz, University of Alberta, and other institutions of higher learning. Dr. Kanchier is known for her pioneering, interdisciplinary approach to human potential.

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Do you see the glass half full or half empty?

March 30, 2020

Do You See the Glass Half Full or Half Empty?

Winston Churchill once said, “A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” Research shows that, on average, human beings are hardwired to be more optimistic than not.

Optimism is an attitude that can positively affect a person’s mental and physical health. Optimism can also help reduce a person’s stress and increase longevity.

Being optimistic is defined as expecting the best possible outcome from any given situation. It thus reflects a belief that future conditions will work out for the best. For this reason, it is seen as a trait that fosters resilience in the face of stress.

Optimism doesn’t mean engaging in wishful or fantastic thinking. It’s a way of looking at the world that gives more agency to the optimist as being at least partly responsible when life is going well. Optimists have healthier outlooks and tend to live longer than their more pessimistic counterparts; they also are less susceptible to the negative effects of illness, fatigue, and depression. However, an unrealistic belief that a person’s future will be full of only positive events can lead them to take unnecessary risks, particularly with their health and finances.

Optimism is a good trait to develop as we face the varied challenges of the coronaviris pandemic

Research indicates that optimism is vitally important in overcoming defeat, promoting achievement, and improving and maintaining health. Studies show that optimists do much better in school, at work, and on the playing field. They regularly exceed the predictions of aptitude tests, and when they run for office, they are more likely than pessimist to get elected. Their health is very good and they tend to live longer.

How Optimistic Are You?

Answer yes or no.

1. I usually count on good things to happen.

2. It’s easy for me to fall asleep.

3. I’m usually confident I’ll achieve my goals.

4. If something can go wrong for me, it will.

5. I’m always hopeful about my future.

6. I enjoy my friends and family.

7. In uncertain times, I usually expect the best.

8. I don’t usually expect things to go my way.

9. Overall, I anticipate more good things will happen to me than bad.

10. I don’t get upset too easily.

Scoring and Interpretation: Give yourself 2 points for responding yes to items 1, 3, 5, 7, and 9; and 2 points for responding no to items 4 and 8. Add your points. The higher your score, the more optimistic you seem to be.

Tips for Becoming Optimistic

You create your own life script by the thoughts you think, and you have the power to change these. One of the most significant findings in psychology is that individuals can choose the way they think.

Pessimists can learn to be optimists by changing their attitudes and learning a new set of cognitive skills.

So can you!

Practice positive self-talk. “I like myself because … “ “I can … “ “I will … “ Use positive statements about such things as being healthy, being in control, or being blessed. Write down affirmations. For example, “I can change … “

Don’t criticize or complain. Think of ways to improve the situation. Avoid phrases such as, “I can’t or “I’m too old.”

Read inspirational books and listen to positive message tapes.

Concentrate on your successes. Create a “success” collage by gluing pictures together that illustrate who you want to be and what you want to accomplish. Include the goal you want to attain, how you want to look, and the personal and professional image you want to project. Look at it every day.

View problems as challenges. If you lose your job, for example, consider it an opportunity to pursue your dream.

Count your blessings — not your troubles. Put enthusiasm into your work.

Write down your negative thoughts and feelings. Indicate why you feel this way. For example, when adversity strikes, listen to your explanation. When it’s pessimistic, dispute it. Use evidence, alternatives, implications, and usefulness as guides. Replace negative thoughts with more positive ones. Each time you catch yourself using a negative phrase, say, “Cancel, cancel.”

Take your mind off your “problems.” Get involved in activities that let you focus your attention away from the problem. For example, go to movies or concerts, meditate, listen to music or invite friends over for dinner, or engage in physical activities.

Greet others with positive, cheerful statements. Smile. This generates enthusiasm, friendliness and good will. Associate with positive, happy people who will give you support and encouragement as you work toward your goals. Make other people feel important — and do it sincerely.

Look for and expect good things to happen. Success is 15 percent aptitude and 85 percent attitude. Your attitude will determine your success in your new venture. Fill your mind with happiness, positive and constructive thoughts, desired outcomes, and helpful ideas. You’re special and have unique talents. You’re a winner.

Research indicates that optimism is vitally important in overcoming defeat, promoting achievement, and improving and maintaining health. Studies show that optimists do much better in school, at work, and on the playing field. They regularly exceed the predictions of aptitude tests, and when they run for office, they are more likely than pessimist to get elected. Their health is very good and they tend to live longer.

Questers described in award winning, Questers Dare to Change Your Job and Life, by Carole Kanchier, discusses numerous other suggestions for strengthening optimism: https://www.amazon.com/Questers-Dare-Change-Your-Life/dp/1508408963

Check audible Questers: https://www.audible.com/pd/Questers-Dare-to-Change-Your-Job-and-Life-Audiobook/B07VZNKGJF?asin=B07VZNKGJF&ipRedirectOverride=true&overrideBaseCountry=true&pf_rd_p=34883c04-32e5-4474-a65d-0ba68f4635d3&pf_rd_r=TN801GRP49AWQSSYMDYC1

Author Bio: Carole Kanchier, PhD, is an internationally recognized newspaper/digital columnist, registered psychologist, coach and author of award winning, Questers Dare to Change Your Job and Life. Kanchier has taught at University of California, Berkeley and Santa Cruz, University of Alberta, and other institutions of higher learning, and worked with clients representing many disciplines. Dr. Kanchier is known for her pioneering, interdisciplinary approach to human potential.

Contact: carole@daretochange.com; carole@questersdaretochange.com; www.questersdaretochange.com

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Are You Honest Work?

March 8, 2020

Are You Honest at Work?

Have you ever lied at work? Do you tell half-truths to get the sale or job? Would you lie to a demanding boss to protect family time?

Check Your Lie Quotient

Answer yes or no.

1. I’ve lied on my resume or fudged reports.

2. I’ll fib to avoid arguments.

3. I fail to disclose pertinent information.

4. I’ve cheated on school or employment tests.

5. I’d tell a face-saving lie to protect my career.

6. I exaggerate the truth or tell white lies to avoid hurting someone.

7. I lie to better serve clients or employer.

8. I’ve stolen office supplies or padded expense accounts.

9. I’ve copied software or used the Internet on company time.

10. I call in sick when I’m not.

Scoring: One point for each “yes.” 7 or higher suggests you could enhance honesty.

Lying is stressful, and stress harms health and accelerates aging. Frequent lying and fear of exposure keeps your body’s “fight or flight” response on. Long term activation of this system may result in health conditions like heart disease.

The Pinocchio Effect also kicks in when you lie. The temperature in the muscles around the nose becomes hotter, according to Emilio Milán and Elvira López at the University of Granada. There is corresponding action in the insular cortex of the brain which controls emotions. Fear of being caught in a lie increases activity in the insular cortex, leading to more heat emanating from the nose. The researchers call this the Pinocchio effect. In Walt Disney’s Pinocchio, the boy puppet’s lies are revealed whenever his wooden nose grows.

Lying damages a person’s self respect and credibility. Dishonesty also affects company productivity. Using company time and stealing small items add up. Honest employees pay for others’ lack of integrity through stricter rules.

Why people lie

We learn to lie. Many children don’t view cheating on exams as theft because some schools fail to show disapproval of students’ cheating. The same message is given when parents cheat on taxes. Children learn all methods for achieving goals are justified.

We fib because we need to appear competent, want to avoid hurt or conflict, desire to protect our jobs, or not rock the boat. Some workers may lie about a sick child to protect themselves from taking another business trip.

Political and business leaders have lied for centuries. Recent studies conducted by Paul Piff, social psychologist, at the University of California, Berkeley, found that self-interests tend to spur the elite to lie and cheat.

“Honesty is the best policy. If I lose mine honor, I lose myself.” William Shakespeare

– Speak cautiously. Exaggerating your ability to meet expectations will hurt your status and your business more than being honest up front. Truth and trust go together.

– Communicate accurately, openly, and transparently. Be explicit, direct, and clear about your motives. State what you need or expect.

– Shift mindset. Lying is a learned survival strategy that can be unlearned. Note what triggers your decision to lie. What fear (e.g., being wrong, hurting someone) is behind this choice? Why do you believe the lie will have a better outcome, and for whom? Reflect on your answers to uncover your motivation.

When you sense yourself crafting a lie, ask yourself. “What’s the worst that can happen if I tell the truth?”

Questers Dare to Change Your Job and Life https://www.amazon.com/Questers-Dare-Change-Your-Life/dp/1508408963 provides additional tips for strengthening honesty.

Check audible Questers: https://www.audible.com/pd/Questers-Dare-to-Change-Your-Job-and-Life-Audiobook/B07VZNKGJF?asin=B07VZNKGJF&ipRedirectOverride=true&overrideBaseCountry=true&pf_rd_p=34883c04-32e5-4474-a65d-0ba68f4635d3&pf_rd_r=TN801GRP49AWQSSYMDYC1

Based on ongoing research, award-winning, Questers Dare to Change redefines life career advancement, and shows how to navigate lifelong career decision making

Author Bio: Carole Kanchier, PhD, is an internationally recognized newspaper/digital columnist, registered psychologist, coach and author of award winning, Questers Dare to Change Your Job and Life. Kanchier has taught at University of California, Berkeley and Santa Cruz, University of Alberta, and other institutions of higher learning, and worked with clients representing many disciplines. Dr. Kanchier is known for her pioneering, interdisciplinary approach to human potential.

m Contact: carole@daretochange.com; carole@questersdaretochange.com; www.questersdaretochange.com

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What is a Quester?

March 2, 2020

ARE YOU A QUESTER? Would you know a Quester if you met one? Could you become one? What are Questers anyway?

Questers think of work differently from most people. Like many, Questers will probably spend a third to half of their adult lives working or thinking about work. But unlike most people at crucial points in their lives, they set off on quests to find new life career challenges.

By learning about the courage and imagination Questers rely on to find career happiness and growth, you may discover ways to take better control of your career—and life. Some started taking charge of their careers early. Others were near retirement.

Where do you fit? Take the Quester Quiz: http://www.questersdaretochange.com/services-2/quester-quiz/

Questers Dare to Change Your Job and Life

https://www.amazon.com/Questers-Dare-Change-Your-Life/dp/1508408963

Why Questers Succeed

Questers are purposeful, innovative, and resilient. They view career advancement as growth of the whole person. Independent, optimistic, and often drawn to challenges, Questers have courage to risk.

Questers measure success by internal standards rather than by “shoulds” of others. They value self-respect more than what others say about them. For them, security must come from within.

Because they work hard and are goal-oriented, they succeed. Some become billionaires or achieve celebrity. Money and prestige, however, are by-products.

Questers include the accountant turned potter, the computer programmer who became a police officer, and the millionaire who started his business with $60.00.

Because Questers create purposeful work, they tend to have higher levels of personal and professional satisfaction than many. Questers are productive, healthy, and happy well into their nineties. Many become centenarians.

Become a Quester Starting Today

Perhaps you’re thinking that Questers must be extraordinary or glamorous people. Not really. They’re individuals like you and me who face career challenges common to most. But they have learned to do something about their challenges. They take charge!

We’re all born with Quester qualities. You see them in infants as they excitedly explore every cupboard in their homes. Unfortunately, as people grow older, many lose this passion for exploring and growing. That doesn’t have to be you!

Start planning for greater personal and professional satisfaction today. Learn from examples of Questers described in award winning, Questers Dare to Change Your Job and Life: https://www.amazon.com/Questers-Dare-Change-Your-Life/dp/1508408963

Check audible Questers: https://www.audible.com/pd/Questers-Dare-to-Change-Your-Job-and-Life-Audiobook/B07VZNKGJF?asin=B07VZNKGJF&ipRedirectOverride=true&overrideBaseCountry=true&pf_rd_p=34883c04-32e5-4474-a65d-0ba68f4635d3&pf_rd_r=TN801GRP49AWQSSYMDYC1Gwen

Author, Dr. Carole Kanchier, encourages you to reassess your views of career success, and strengthen Quester traits such as purpose and intuition to succeed. Carole Kanchier has worked with clients representing varied industries, and has taught at the University of Alberta, University of California, Berkeley and Santa Cruz, and other institutions of higher learning. She chaired the Career Change Committee, National Career Development Association, and was Advisory Board member, College Admission Counseling Program, University of California, Berkeley.

Contact: Carole Kanchier: carole@questersdaretochange.com; carole@daretochange.com; www.questersdaretochange.com

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3 Tips for Minimizing Job Burnout

February 28, 2020

3 Tips for Minimizing Job Burnout

Are you tired, irritable, feel powerless about aspects of your job? If so, you may be headed for burnout. Job burnout is a chronic stress syndrome caused by work and societal stress, as well as personal characteristics. But burnout is preventable and treatable, and can be a catalyst for growth.

– Keep problems in perspective. Don’t fear failure. View mistakes as learning experiences. If you have a setback, identify what went wrong, modify plans and try again.

– Manage time. Keep a daily record and recognize time-wasting habits. Make lists and prioritize. Avoid unnecessary meetings and delegate when possible.

– Restructure job. Clarify roles, responsibilities, goals. Know what’s expected. Explore ways to creatively redesign job to work more effectively.

– Develop support systems. Cultivate meaningful, supportive relationships. Share frustrations with trusted individuals. Consider professional assistance. .

Questers Dare to Change Your Job and Life, by Dr. Carole Kanchier, offers many other tips for minimizing burnout as well as practical guidelines for taking charge of your career and life.https://www.amazon.com/Questers-Dare-Change-Your-Life/dp/1508408963

Contact; carole@questerstochange.com; www.questersdaretochange.com

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Contact: carole@daretochange.com; carole@questersdaretochange.com; www.questersdaretochange.com

Use Time Out To Re-examine Goals and Plan for Success

Questers Dare to Change Your Job and Life Shows How

Contact: carole@daretochange.com; carole@questersdaretochange.com; www.questersdaretochange.com

Questers Dare to Change Your Job and Life